Pandamonium on the Course

Before I left for Florida, I loaded my apps on my iPhone and packed my computer so I could post every interesting tidbit from my trip and tournament. My intentions were good, but my execution fell short.
I brought beautiful weather with me and was extremely fortunate to enjoy three lovely rounds of golf. The theme at this sensational member-guest tournament was "Slow Boat to China." I couldn't believe all the creative ideas that were incorporated into this tournament. It was truly amazing.

Our panda cart received many compliments, much like our giraffe cart from last summer. The matching skorts I made were also a hit. Now I need to complete my other Project Fairway outfits that are still lying on my dining room table.Check out the wooden boats that floated in the pool during our luncheon. I was absolutely blown away. The golfing gals in charge of this event didn't miss a beat and thought of every possible detail.

I loved how much everyone got into the spirit of this tournament. About 300 gals competed and almost all showed up wearing some kind of Chinese fashion statement—not to mention the Asian-inspired golf carts.
In the end, no crystal was won, but we had a wonderful time. My golfing gal pal played a great game, but mine was clearly rusty and nowhere near the 10 handicap I worked so hard for last fall. But girlfriend golf just doesn't get any better than this.

Feeling a Little Sheddy

I arrived! This was actually quite an accomplishment for me since I detest flying. But our Air Tran flight was easy breezy. I did have a small breakfast cocktail to calm some nerves, but leaving snow and ice behind gave me an extra dose of courage.
The weather is gorgeous, but my game is another story. Apparently I'm a bit "sheddy." I discovered transferring my new swing from the shed to the course is a little more challenging than I expected. I also have no idea how far I hit my clubs and reading Bermuda greens is a new experience for me. But I'm simply thrilled to be warm and playing.
I brought my Flip video, but not the charged batteries to power it. Oops! So here is my brief video of our round yesterday. I was delighted with this shot because it found the fairway, not sand. There's a lot of sand in Florida and the traps are really trappy.

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John Daly: Through Thick & Thin

Anyone who reads this blog knows I'm a true John Daly fan. I've had the premiere of his new show, Being John Daly, on my calendar for months.

Some of my friends like to make fun of me for my lion head covers. Wait until they see my new "collection" this season. But believe it or not, JD and I have far more in common than lions.

• We both hate to fly.
• JD has an ironing obsession and so do I—just ask my Facebook friends.
• We both like to sing. I use a 5-iron mic, he plays guitar.
• Honesty comes easy to us–maybe too easy.
• He gave up Crown Royal for golf. I gave up caffeine.
• JD & I both overswing—but in a good way.
• We both love golf and have hope for some amazing things to come.
  
• Loyalty is important to us.
• We've both had some antics on and off the course.
• Neither one of us is a stranger to mistakes.
• We are both writing new chapters in our lives.

Here's the deal: I greatly appreciate JD's honesty in a world where wearing masks appears to be far more common (and easier) than showing who we really are.

JD may make mistakes, but he doesn't hide from them. He used to be a big target for those looking for a story. Well, now the target is much smaller, literally and figuratively. But you just won't find JD bashing here. We're way too much alike.

Golf Skirts: The Long & the Skort of It

Many folks have addressed the preeminent "short skirt" issue on the golf course—what's appropriate and what's not. How short is too short?

The short skort debate quickly evolves, or devolves, into the "tummy" issue. Should golfing gals show their midriffs during a round? I personally like to keep mine covered, but I'm sure it's bulged slipped out once or twice.

Then we inevitably end with discussion about why golfing gals have more leniency in golf dress codes than men. Golfing gals can usually wear shirts without collars, sleeveless shirts and short skorts. Here's my take on the issue which will hopefully close the debate once and for all: Life isn't fair, so get over it.
Only men are worthy enough to belong to Augusta, but women get to wear short skorts on the golf course. It's really that simple. I don't consider myself a bra-burning feminist. I believe men and women are simply different, and that's okay—as long as I can still outdrive them. I keeeeeed. I keeeeeeeed.

But seriously, folks, let's enjoy the golfing differences and not get all hung up on things being the "same"—unless men really want to start wearing short skirts on the course. Personally I'm fine with men wearing shorts on the tour. I'm cool by kilts too for that matter (with or without Slix), but Commissioner Finchem hasn't rang me for my opinion.

Ultimately it all comes down to what's considered "classy" and what's considered "trashy." This line can be very fine, my friends. It's impossible to define "classy." But generally speaking, if a garment requires you to use sunscreen where you never have before, it might not be appropriate. Fortunately, I use a lot of sunscreen.

I Have No Balls

I hate the snow.
I hate practicing inside.
I hate hitting off rubber mats.
I hate not being able to follow my ball in the gray skies.
I hate freezing my fanny off.
I hate whining about the cold.
But I really hate it when the range runs out of balls.

This winter central Ohio had record-breaking snowfall. WHOO HOO! I am also very proud to live in a state that had exactly ONE sunny day in February. Can you say Xanax?

I tried to keep my chin up. I started Project Fairway in my dining room by making some golf skorts for some upcoming tourneys. I also performed some Trading Spaces projects in my home.

Most important, I continued to hit balls fearlessly into the snow, wind, sleet, and gray. Nothing was going to stop me from improving my swing this winter. Until....the shed ran out of balls.

Yup. All the golf balls are buried under the snow and the picker can't retrieve them. Now that's depressing.

But fortunately I have one more option in Columbus, which is the "Dome." The Dome is a double-decker enclosed driving range. You can't really tell how far you are hitting the ball, but you can hit freely and warmly. At least the background is blue, not gray, and the kids love hitting off the top deck of the Dome—no worm burners.

So I'll be back at the Dome today preparing for my golf trip to Florida. Six more days till takeoff. I just might be able to make it.

Editor's Note: Here's an updated version of my swing. I'm also sporting a really cute ribbon belt that one of my favorite readers was kind enough to send me for my trip, but I just couldn't wait to wear it.

Editor's Other Note: The weather didn't stop 200 golfers from attending the 15th annual Chili Open in Canton last month (see photo above). The first thaw is expected to reveal hundreds of fluorescent golf balls.

Brian Gay Feeds the Animals

Why can't I live in Arizona?

Not only would I be golfing, I would enjoy the Waste Management Phoenix Open, and all its glory—in person. As one who is gravely concerned about the epidemic proportions of GITH disease, I must admit, I love the frivolity of the crowd at this tourney.

It's crazy. It's drunken. It's like nothing else. It draws record crowds, many of whom I'm guessing don't even play golf.

The highlight today was watching Brain Gay throw headcovers into the stadium crowd on the 16th hole. It was like he was feeding fish to seals at the zoo. Brilliant, Mr. Gay. Simply brilliant.

Editor's Note: I was also quite fond of Mr. Villegas using his spider-like moves to read a 6-inch putt. Bravo!

Hey Bartender! I'll Have a Golftini, Please.

Every gal needs a perfect black dress. Every golfing gal needs a perfect black skort.

But back in 2003, Susan Hess couldn't find that ideal black skort—one that could be worn on and off the course. So she decided to make her own. It was a humble beginning for Golftini, but six PGA trade shows later, Hess's skorts have become incredibly popular and with good reason. They fit great, look great and play great.

I get so many compliments on my Golftini skorts on the course and around town. In fact, many of my non-golfing friends have asked me where they can buy them. Who would have ever thought that conversation would take place 10 years ago?

Every golfing gal can find a skort at Golftini. Some skorts are sassy and bold, while others are preppy and classic. The one thing that's the same is Golftini's reliable fit and top-notch quality. All the garments are manufactured in New York.

Golftini is known for simple lines coupled with beautiful prints and exquisite trims. Their fabrics are exclusively designed and made with 97% cotton and 3% spandex. I love the stretch in these skorts. It allows you to swing, tee up, and jump a fence if necessary.

This season I am quite fond of Golftini's Blue Black Medallion Skort and the Pink Geometric Skort. If you are looking for something more understated, check out the Signature Pleated Skort in black, light blue, white, khaki and hot pink. All of Golftini bottoms are souped up with great golf pockets.

Golftini skorts are well known and easily recognizable, but don’t rule out their beautiful tops. The Fashion Top is very feminine with flutter sleeves, a small Peter Pan collar, and a 3-button placket. The Shortsleeve Polo has a flattering quarter zip neck and martini logo. In addition to skorts and shirts, Golftini designs pants, skirts, bermuda shorts, sweaters, performance pullovers, knit vests, fashion tops and accessories.

I love that all of these designs can currently be purchased online at Golftiniwear.com. Be sure to check out the sale section for some great deals on last year's line. Same great style, just different fabrics.

Irons Are Overrated

If anyone should teach a course in how to shoot 80 without long irons, it's me.

I'm not proud of this fact, but my iron play last fall was abysmal. There's nothing like trembling over a 110-yard par three—a formerly beloved hole where I actually had my hole in one. But back in October, I would rather have had a 150-yard shot over water because I could hit a wood, or "metal." BTW, I hate the phrase 5-metal. I get that it's made of metal, but a 3-wood is a 3-wood. Period.

This past fall I learned how important it is to work with what you have. I was strong with everything except my irons. I'm well aware that wedges are irons, but for this post I am not including them in my definition of irons. Therefore, I can report that I almost became a single-index last year with only two irons in my bag: an 8-iron and a 9-iron. How embarrassing is that?

My fear of irons happened after I hit a couple of the dreaded hosel shots. I tried to work through it at the range, but the truth is my bad swing habits had finally caught up with me. It was time for a complete overhaul of my swing, but I wasn't ready to tackle that job. That was winter work as far as I was concerned. Besides, I had already told the world about my intentions to become a single-index by the end of the 2009 season and had to follow through.

The fall weather actually helped me avoid my irons. It was cold and wet, which meant I had longer approach shots that allowed me to use a hybrid or wood instead of an iron. This was good news as far as I was concerned.

Hitting greens in regulation was also much more difficult in these conditions. My short game became key and that's where I spent my practice time. I know we all hear that short-game practice is the quickest way to improve your game, but many of us I am guilty of pounding balls instead. But since my iron practice was futile, I finally worked on my short game. Putting and chipping was my main focus and I turned out to be pretty darn good at both.

My "Mad Mission" to reduce my index made me approach the game differently. I was determined to find a way to make par on as many holes as I could—even without my irons. Sure, my arsenal of golfing weapons was smaller, but motivation made up for not packing metal in my bag.

I don't suggest that golfers try to become a single-index without playing their irons, but I am living proof that it can almost be done.

What a Match Off!

Match Play can make you cuckoo. No wonder I love it.

The Accenture Match Play Championship was great fun this weekend. Anyone who has competed in match play knows how intense and unpredictable it can be. It requires an entirely different mindset. It's much harder to "play your own game." Before each shot you must take into consideration the position of your opponent.

I laughed when Golfing Son sat down on the couch with me this weekend and said, "Oh I know what this is. It's match off, right?" First, I was oh-so proud that he immediately knew this was different than what is normally on our telly during the weekend—stroke play. Second, I thought his comment was quite insightful. Surprising, huh?

In match play, the goal is to win as many holes as possible and "knock off" your opponent. Golfing Son also understood that they were playing against one competitor at a time, and once a player loses his match he's out of the tournament: Match Off.

I had quite a "match-off" during one of my rounds at my course's match play championship last summer. In our equivalent of the semi-finals, I played one of my good golfing buds. We were wondering how we would compete against each other without cracking up. She actually took her own cart to concentrate, which was a good idea, even though I gave her a hard time about it.

On the 13th hole, our most difficult par-5, she started off by topping her tee shot. The ball popped high in the air, flew backwards over her head, and landed several yards behind the tee box. We both almost busted a gut laughing so hard. She's usually a huge hitter and pounds some insanely long drives. I believe I was up two holes at that point. With her negative yardage I figured this hole was mine. Think again!

I hit a crummy drive, but at least I had made some forward progress. At one point she said, "I guess I should just give you the hole." I told her the hole was far from over, but it was up to her. Why didn't I say, "Yeah, we should probably move on"?

She continued to play. We both proceeded to plop shots into the pond, the trees, and the sand. If there was a hazard, we found it. We both finally reached the green, and by this time we were buckled over in laughter with tears running down our faces.

In the end she won that hole with an ugly, ugly 8, or maybe it was a 9, thus edging out my 17. This actually gave her some momentum and it took me a couple of hours to get my act back together. I won that tough match 2-up, and I learned an important lesson. Never assume the hole is yours—even if your partner starts with negative yardage.

Here's how cuckoo Match Game can make you.

Loud on the Outside, Slix Underneath

Did you ever think, "Man, John Daly should model underwear?" Well, you should now.

Forget hitting off a beer can sans shirt, JD is now sporting some Slix new undies. So now we all know what he wears underneath his Loudmouth pants.

“Slix boxer briefs are the most ridiculously comfortable underwear I’ve ever put on,” says my bud, JD. “When I’ve got my Slix on, it’s all good.”

Hmmm. I'm guessing when he's not wearing his Slix, things are pretty good too, but according to JD, this underwear is something he "doesn't want to take off."

Slix was founded by Greg Hall, who wasn't digging traditional men's cotton underwear. He wanted skivvies that didn't stretch out, retain moisture, or come untucked. Thus Slix was born. This cutting-edge underwear is designed to be versatile enough to wear to the office, under jeans or shorts, working out, or under his board shorts at the beach.

The unique Slix material is designed to be super-comfy. It wicks, breathes, and dries quickly. No tugging or "readjusting" with these briefs. Wish I could say the same about some of my polka-dot numbers.

Slix is offered exclusively online and will soon offer a "Sustained Performance Plan" to keep men continuously supplied with new underwear. I have to say, I love this idea. But what about us ladies? We want to get some Slix on too!

So far the Slix appear to be working. He shot a 68 yesterday and a 69 today at the Mayakoba Golf Classic. JD is currently tied for 17th and is 5-under in his new Slix underwear. How about that for making the cut!